The Amazing Acro-Cats featuring Tuna and the Rock Cats

By Laura Diem

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Listen up, beanbags. There is a lot going on in Atlanta these days. Mostly traffic and weather… and people updating their Facebook statuses about traffic and weather. Much appreciated btdubs since I don’t own a TV, a phone, a computer, a car or eyeballs.

Anyways, now that the excitement of Tribble finally coming home from his “sailing trip” (read: he was in rehab) has passed, it’s time to focus on more important things, like seeing A CAT CIRCUS ROCK BAND.

Yeah. Let that soak in. There is LITERALLY a rock band made of cats coming to The 7 Stages Theatre called “The Amazing Acro-Cats featuring Tuna and the Rock Cats”. Holy sh*t, what.

Brb watching the music video again.

Naturally, my mature friends and I will be attending the matinee show this Saturday at 4pm. I don’t really know what’s going to happen, mostly because I spent all week crying and losing my mind over this like any normal person would – but what I do know is that real live cats might be playing guitars. I think. K, take all my money.

Hopefully we will have some critic reviews and autographs to share next week if we don’t:

A: Get blackout drunk

B: Die from excitement

C: Storm the stage and go to jail

Yikes.

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Tickets:  http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/1332875

WTF is Wigwam?

by Trey Humphreys

A wig factory? A party in a teepee? Another EDM festival? Weird hippie pants?

No. It’s not another EDM festival full of 14 year olds and flowers nor is it a wig party. Damn it. Wait, there is a fantastic idea. A Wig festival? Holy shit. Stay tuned for the first ever Wig Festival brought to you by A Social Mess this summer. My God, that’s genius. I digress….

Wigwam Fest is the brainchild of our very own JLL. She got sick a few years back and damn near tried every form of medicine / health activity from China to Mars. She got well and now is bringing her world of experience to you with the help of every specialist in the state of Georgia. It is a smorgasbord of all things healthy (note: it took me 8 minutes to figure out how to spell that word).

You know all those bizarre things your healthy friends do that are confusing as nuts? THEY WILL BE EXPLAINED / TAUGHT / DEMONSTRATED / ENCOURAGED at this event. Come out and learn what Kale is and how to pronounce Quinoa. Figure out the secrets to meditation and Super Jenny’s soup. Be inspired by inspiring people doing inspiring things to inspire your life. The word “inspire” actually comes from the latin “In Spire” which translates to “get your shit together”. I think.

Or are you sick of going to the Ivy every Sunday to see the same blowhards drink shitty champagne mimosas all afternoon then battling waves of migraine hangovers on Monday at the office?

I say try something new and refreshing. Try WIGWAM. What a fun word to say. WIGWAM. Kinda makes me want to dance (see hip hop fit class at WIGWAM). WIGWAM. Name your next pet cat WIGWAM. WIGWAM the cat. Hey WIGWAM, want a biscuit? Do cats eat biscuits? Gluten free biscuits?

I think ol girl has 8000 different kinds of yoga classes lined up as well as the best chefs / nutrition folks in Atlanta ready to explain how to eat things that don’t make you fat and lazy. You will walk away with a world of information about how to better your life, body and mind. If not, I will give you your money back and buy you a used scooter, jug of beet juice with fish oil supplements and a Shake Weight.

There are four Sundays you can choose from and many different classes / talks / forums you can pick each day. Or just come and sit around. There are no rules. Except for me not wearing a wig.

Do something good for your mind and body for once that doesn’t include Booze, Tinder, Golden Corral, Netflix, Krispy Kreme or huffing paint. Try Wigwam. Damn I love that word. WIGWAM.

Promo code ASM saves you $$ at Wigwam Fest.

TreyWam

Useless Facts & Other Useless Narcissistic Anecdotes about The Beltline

Greetings Messians, It’s your old pal Mr. Thoughtful again. Tom is still Spring Break raging in the Himalayas right now, most likely getting catfished by lonely goat herders cruising the Nepal Backpages. And telling the local talent on Tinder that he knows Bert from The Bert Show. I’m cool with all this, I just know he’s letting his Farmville go to ruins and we’re not gonna hear the end of it when he gets back. So frightfully, you’re still stuck with me- the responsible one.

Is anyone still reading? Cool. Spring time in Atlanta, Georgia is one of the most magnificent wonders in all of God’s green earth. The tulips, the azalea blooms, they pop like a Saturday night Westend gun fight. The girls in wayfarers and yoga pants are roaming like wild dogs in heat. The pheromones are stirred up like a Hal’s martini. And the blood… well the blood, sir, gets boiling.

So let’s talk turkey about other things that Boil (This is called a conversation segue. No, not that kind of Segway). Our besties are throwing a little sun soaked afternoon soirée this Saturday knowns as The Beltline Boil. In honor of Tom’s ex-fiancé/professional blogger/Taste Maker/boner hoarder Ashley Hesseltine, lets blog! (Blogs are basically just really long Facebook status updates, right?)

Useless Facts & Other Useless Narcissistic Anecdotes about The Beltline

By: Mayor of Ponce

  • Yoga Pants.
  • Should it not be called “The BeltLoop”? No? Can this please be a thing. You know, like “Hotlanta”! J.k.-ing
  • How has some heroic gentleman, i.e. read: creep, not started an Instagram account called @BaesoftheBeltline?? This would be panty-line voyeurism worthy of museums. Get on this, @brosbeingbasic.
  • There’s this weird water tower thingy on the south end that’s really interesting. If I were to ever capture a princess, this is where she would be kept. Take note, GBI.

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  • I used to live in the corner Loft of the Ford Factory right at the Ponce bridge. This was long before the “Beltloop” was ever a twinkle of Ryan Gravels eye. We referred to it as “The Crack Track”- and it was lovely entertainment for the whole fam. Hobo’s and miscreants alike would use it for sex, shitting, liquor hiding from other hobos, bum fights, bum trails, and of course partaking in crack cocaine- thus it’s pet moniker.
  • I’m utterly baffled Fitness with Jeff hasn’t littered this thing with his hilarious bullshit. It would tickle me senseless to see a teal 94 Pontiac Grand Prix with his insignia posted up in some highly visible shrubbery like its artwork. Someone commission this for the sake of prosperity and people needing to get fit!
  • Yoga Pants.
  • One morning I was so over-served from the night before that I walked the wrong way for 15 minutes. Still in costume.
  • Segway’s (No, not that kind of segue) aren’t allowed. Which is a damn crime within itself.
  • There are d-bag dudes who ride in full on Greg Lemond spandex gear, doing 40mph on their $5k road bikes. Hey fuqboi, maybe training for the Gerardmer Mountain Stage of the Tour de France shouldn’t be done in an intensely packed path of soccer moms, baby stollers, and Shih Tzus. But you look cool in your breathable nut huggers, though. Get a real hobby- Like drinking. And wearing spandex nuthuggers as a joke.
  • There’s a lady who walks and plays a fiddle. Which is actually pretty cool. Great cities have buskers and oddballs. I’m all for more Baton Bob’s and Dong de Leon’s.
  • I used to live in the Sampson Street Lofts for a couple years right next door to what is now Ladybird. These buildings, for those who are unfamiliar, are magical, seedy lofts seemingly only held together by spray paint and hash residue. This lawless shelter is owned by a burnt out deadhead who is a dead ringer for Doc Brown. I was once evicted from one loft and simply moved 5 feet to the next space over. Which of course made perfect sense to Doc Brown.

So there we have it. The Atlanta Beltline in a nut shell- or nut huggers, if that’s your thing. We shall frolic this Saturday, and in all seriousness, lets join in and raise a glass to Wallace Hume Carrothers (1896-1937)- the man who invented nylon. Or let me put this in a more relatable reference- Here’s to Sir Wallace Carrothers, the man who invented Yoga Pants!

Peace in da Middle East! *mic drop*

Get Tickets.

-maymay

PS- Pray from Treys Farmville.

PPS- ASM needs a private G-5 jet. We just need 65 million dollars. So, if only 65 of you donated a million dollars each, we will have meet our goal. Ante thy tithes, Messians! We need to go find Trey.

That Time Jennifer and John John got Mohawks.

by Promo Code Lester

I am grateful for my body every day – that I have the ability to move and be alive. For a brief time, I wasn’t sure that would be the case.

Three years ago I was diagnosed with an aggressive triple negative breast cancer. I was barely 31 (no family history) & living with my boyfriend, whose mother was also fighting breast cancer; only she was in stage IV.

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It was a major awakening. I seriously considered following her path and moving to the Eastern hemisphere to “Eat Pray Love”; but my tumor was off the charts aggressive and my docs were of course very against it (not to mention the strong-willed Steve Jobs had just lost that battle). So, I decided it was probably best to approach healing with a combination of Eastern + Western methods.

Me: 1/3 of this mess …

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I started taking a new kind of cocktail: 8 rounds of nasty chemo straight from the mixologist … but! I paired it with every resource I could get my hands on: detox plans, choking down Chinese herbs 4x/day (so gross!), listening to sound therapy (still our #1 go to when we can’t sleep), going to acupuncture 3x/week, practicing mediation, doing yoga, sitting in foot baths, exploring essential oils, juicing, trying hypnotherapy (thank GOD for this), I cleaned out my food + beauty cabinets, revisited my diet, swapped over to safe cleaning products, Durga became my best friend. I tried everything. (Meet my “everything” in person at Wigwam Fest).

Meanwhile, there were parties to be thrown.

A St Patricks Day Festival

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A few days after my first chemo treatment, I threw an art auction at The Goat Farm.

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I knew my hair was going to fall out, so I got a mohawk from Mandy. Other people got them, too. Trey and Maria somehow grew more hair. Odd.

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We threw a Bud Light Braves tailgate.

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Threw a date auction fundraiser with a little help from my friends.

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Created a new 5K called Stache Dash.

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And I curated a gallery exhibition for the OLG kiddos with Sunflowerman.

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Then my hair fell out. You know when you have thought where you want to be a rebel & shave your head like Natalie Portman in “V for Vendetta? That’s a good idea for about a day. It was actually gone. It has been three years now, and only recently reached a length where I feel like confident (or like a girl) again. I never knew how much that defined me until it was gone. Totally ridiculous. I will say there was a part of me that felt like I earned some sort of badge & that it was cleansing in some strange way.

Almost six months later, Erik and I went to Key West for a “Bon Voyage, Tata’s” trip. It was the only time I wasn’t sporting a beanie.

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ASM also threw a farewell rave. Normal. And sober. 48 hours til surgery.

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I went in to have a double mastectomy and full reconstruction. Two major female parts that define a woman: my hair, and my lady parts…gone. That night before surgery I had a naked cry fest staring at my marked up breasts for the last time in the mirror. I hope none of you every have to do that. The reality is, I have multiple girlfriends that have been diagnosed, some of which I met through this experience. Others have been in my group of girlfriends for years. Big ups to Kattya Lomel, Ashley Marrone (who is teaching at Wigwam Fest), Lisa George, Melissa Simmons & my Facebook friend Jessica Teal & all of the other gals that have been on the same journey. About 1 in 8 U.S. women will develop breast cancer over the course of her lifetime.

And then…

When I got out of surgery – the doctors told me that they could not find my tumor. That the chemotherapy (eh hem, and maybe the other zillion weapons I took to battle) had done it’s work – literally destroyed it. My oncologist later told me that we went into that fight with a 20% chance chemo would have been effective. TWENTY. I was deemed to have “complete pathologic remission”. What have we learned here? Basically, percentages are like weathermen: 20% chance doesn’t mean $hit.

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With the help of my army (see: Wigwam Lineup), I slowly picked myself up off the ground. I dabbled in exercise. One night, I told Erik I was thinking about taking a dance class. He, of course, jumped online and put that thought into action (dreamy). I went the next day and fell in love with moving my body all over again. Hip Hop Fit, y’all (April 12 at Wigwam Fest).

I decided to take my second chance a little more seriously. Have you heard about my new event?

One month after my final surgery, Erik proposed.

We ran off to get married in Bali.

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His mother, a goddess healer herself, passed shortly after. (Love you Mama Ling).

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Wigwam has been a vision for some time, inspired by the brilliant resources either I’ve personally had the honor of experiencing or someone from the core team has sworn by. I think I’m still here because I can be a resource for all of the seekers out there. I have a gift for presenting experiences in a fun way – the instructors are the real magic where guests come alive. Hope you will join us for an adventure that will inspire and excite. Your Wigwam adventure awaits…


What’s Wigwam Fest? It’s kind of like a music festival w/ 9 stages, but the “stages” are in nature: a pavillion, a rooftop deck, a garden, a pond, an outdoor classroom, a walking path, a theatre, etc. and the “acts” are wellness related – anything from fitness (stand up paddle board, salsa dancing, yoga, hip hop fit, barre, stretch, pilates, blast, etc.) to speakers (inspirational journeys and bad a** entrepreneurs like Jennifer Levison, Missi Wolf and Ladypreneur) to Workshops (ayurveda, vision mapping, sound therapy, an exercise in “Shine Theory”, meditation, chef demonstrations, juicing, how to read food/beauty labels).

Where is the Festival Held? It’s held in Roswell at Chattahoochee Nature Center, just 16 miles north of Buckhead (day retreat!). The event will be in 9 different venues over 127 acres. Click here to see a few photos of the venue.

When is Wigwam Fest? The festival dates are April 12, April 19, April 26 and May 3. You can purchase a single day or series pass. When you purchase your ticket, you sign up for (4) one hour experiences you’re interested in for that day. All fests are on Sunday from about 9-5.

What is a Typical Fest Day Like? Each Sunday starts with an opening ceremony for the group (every week is different), then you go to your first 2 experiences, break for late lunch/market/exploration time for 1.5 hours, then have 2 more experiences.

Get Tickets.

Beltline Boil this Saturday

Alright Mess makers, Mayor here. Tom is off in the Himalayan Lost & Found section looking for his soul. Also probably trying to turn the old Kathmandu Pizza Hut into the Smokebelly Nepal location. Soft opening spring 2020- save the date. Our girl Lester-Lingvall is busy in her teepee laboratory inventing magic yoga pants that cure hangovers. John John doesn’t have a computer. And Hess is elbow deep writing a blog about the top 3 places in Atlanta you can shove a selfie stick. It’ll probably go viral. So you goons are stuck with me, the good looking one.

Now enough of this Tom Foolery, let’s cut to the crash. Do you have anything to do this weekend? Do you have friends that do stuff with you outside of bars? Have you ever actually left Buckhead before on purpose? Then brother, let ol’ maymay give you the skinny. There is a magical ring that circles Atlanta- no, not 285. It’s this thing called The Beltine… or Beltloop. Or something. I just know it has something to do with braided belts. And feral cougars speed walking in packs. And Nikky Williams in roller blades. And baby strollers the size of Volkswagens.

ANYWHO. Our pals are throwing a little hootenanny hoedown come this Saturday called the Beltline Boil. There’s gonna be booze, bands, broads, belts, boils and food tastings not from Smokebelly. Proceeds go to charity, so I think it’s about time you pull yourself up from your Sperry straps and do something with your life, bro! I mean, look at Tom. My man can’t even find his iPhone, and he’s on the other side of the world looking for his inner self while chillin with dudes in towels like it’s the Mansly Mall LA Fitness.

Get tickets here.

See you Saturday. I love you.
Eat. Pray. Yolo.
-maymay

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10 Things I Discovered in Nepal

Well guess what? It’s my birthday and I decided it was imperative that I journey to Nepal and trek up into the Himalayan Mountains. Have I ever been hiking? No. Where better to start than the enormous and cold mountains of Nepal. I also figured the best age to start is 42. Common sense people.

Plus I’m looking for that eat, pray, love gal to see if she is ready for a relationship.

Now, let me briefly explain my exercise routine prior to coming to Nepal:

  • jogging a hair over 2 miles once every couple of months, on average. Generally.
  • Fitness level? Exceedingly high.

But first, I want to tell you folks some of the things I have learned about Katmandu, Nepal where I have spent the last few days.

11. It is a sprawling city of 800,000 people and has electricity. Most of the day. Or half of the day.  Welcome to 2015.

10. There appears to be slightly over 25 billion feral dogs roaming everything. I assume the leash laws are relaxed.

9. You are not supposed to look the car-sized monkeys in the eyes. With this information, I tried it. Then I shit my pants when the beast lunged at me displaying his fantastic teeth.

8. Hindus have 33 million Gods. My broken English tour guide told me every single one of them as we strolled by 3 burning bodies at a large Hindu temple. I paid $10 for the tour. Can’t remember one God.

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7. The cows are fairly dumb.

6. A man on the street asked me if I wanted any hash. I said no. Then the next 1600 men in the streets asked me if I wanted to buy hash. I bought a fake North Face jacket. There seems to be hash available if needed.

5. Honking solves nothing but does seem to be a fad over here.

4. They have bugs also.

3. There are no McDonald’s, Starbucks or Crossfit gyms. There are also no western sitting toilets. So un-awkward.

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2. A Nepalese fellow explained to me that it would cost him 20k to come to America. The Nepal government will not issue Visas to Nepal citizens to come to the U.S. (For the most part). I told him to count his blessings because Mississippi sucks.

1. The people of Nepal are possibly the nicest, most honest people I have met in 20 years of travel. That is a fact.

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I recommend that everyone put this amazing place on their bucket list. Now, off to the mountains with a shitty, fake North Face jacket and a box of wet wipes.

Trey

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Lepre*CON 2015 Photos

Thank you to all the Irish-ish people that came out to Lepre*CON 2015 this past Saturday at the Park Tavern. Here are the pictures (sans some that we are not allowed to show due to FAA regulations and an uptight legal team). WARNING: if you don’t like hot chicks, good times, fat guys, terrible costumes, madness or wigs please refrain from viewing our pictures.

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So, our girl Jennifer has gone off and created a new revolutionary event / experience here in Atlanta to feed our souls and cure our body and minds. I thought all you had to do was drink coconut water and eat truck loads of kale juice with flax seed oil. Well, apparently there is more to the whole “mind, body & spirit” world and she has built an event to show us every single aspect of better living. THANK GOD. Postpone liver failure one more year.

In a nutshell, it is a day full of various talks, demonstrations and activities like yoga, clean eating, meditation and other things healthy, happy people enjoy. The beauty of this beast is you will come out of this one with a “happy hangover” instead of a “BRUTAL, THROBBING, I HATE MYSELF, vodka hangover”.

Now, there are 100 different wellness experiences offered over the course of four weeks (click here for the full list), but these are the ones I am going to choose for my April 12th adventure:

  1. Welcome Ceremony at 9:55 am. Seems easy enough. I like to be welcomed to places.
  2. Exploration Yoga with Elizabeth Ocheltree at 10:30am. Guess what? I don’t have a clue how do yoga nor have I ever seen a downward dog but assume they don’t bite and are tame plus I hate cats. This class should cover it.
  3. Ayurvedic Spring Cleaning & Medicine Making with Anna Apotheca at 11:45 am. God knows I need some internal spring cleaning. I have no idea what medicine making is but it sounds easier than cooking. I’m in.
  4. Stellar Bodies Bootcamp with Amy Selig at 2:15pm. What are the odds there are a bushel of hot chicks in this class? Good. I’m in.
  5. Clean Eating Chef Demonstration with Jessica Hanners of Souper Jenny at 3:30pm.  Have you ever crushed a bag of Krystals and felt good after? Hell no. Time to figure out how to cook fish and make broccoli taste good.

Listen friends, do yourself a favor and spend a Sunday with Jennifer and her team of experts. It will change your life, I swear to God. For the better. She is running this job four Sundays in a row and you can come to one or all of them. If you see my fat ass there don’t point and laugh. Karma is a bitch.

Woo Woo Trey…..

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Here we go folks. Finally. The time has come. We dance. We drink. We pee. We make poor decisions. Lepre*CON 2015.

Here are some suggestions on how to make the best of this wondrous festival of life and booze:

  • Do – Take Uber, Taxi or have your mom drop you off. The 9 parking spaces at Piedmont Park are taken at 8AM and you will be fuming with booze when you leave.
  • Don’t – Bring cats. We will have adopt-a-cat onsite.
  • Do – Buy tickets online before hand so you don’t have to wait in line with the peasants.
  • Don’t – Take ambien before you arrive.
  • Do – Wear a fanny pack to keep your keys, condoms, passport and drink tickets safe.
  • Don’t – FaceTime your grandparents from the Spring Break stage.
  • Do – FaceTime your ex-boyfriend from the Spring Break stage.
  • Don’t – get wasted before 4PM…pace yourself ….unless you are trying to avoid Uber surcharges at the end of the day and social encounters with other humans.
  • Do – Wear something outstanding and dumb…it is the Social Mess way + what we are all about. May we suggest a nice blouse and helmet.
  • Don’t – Eat Taco Bell. Ever.

Well, that about sums it up. If you have any questions about the party, ask Jeeves. In the meantime, get your Tinder game straight and spray tan 36 hours prior to the event.

Upper Management

Lepre*CON Festival Information

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Come one, come all.  As you know, we are taking over Park Tavern Saturday for our Annual St. Patrick’s Day Festival. Here are the details:

  • Doors open at 2 pm
  • Doors close at 2:30 am
  • 21 + event
  • Entrance is at the top of Park Tavern in the front where you pull in. Look for the doors in the front of the stone building.
  • Drink Tickets: Park Tavern will be selling drink tickets (1 for $6, 5 for $20 or a sh*t ton for $100) which eliminates lines at the bars. You can buy the drink tickets once you arrive at the entrance and downstairs. Unused drink tickets can be sold back to Park Tavern for $5 each before 10pm.
  • The Stage is outside in the lawn at the bottom of the hill – that shifts to under the tent once it gets dark.
  • Bathrooms: Everywhere
  • VIP – That ticket is a joke.
  • FOOD: there is plenty of food offered all day that can be purchased with tickets

ENTERTAINMENT:

SPRING BREAK STAGE:

  • 2 PM | KIMBER | DJ SET
  • 3:30PM | JACOB & THE GOOD PEOPLE
  • 5 PM | DJ CANNONBALL & DJ MADFLIP
  • 6PM | CONTESTS AND DEBAUCHERY WITH DIRTY SOUTH TRIVIA
  • 6:15PM |  DJ EU

UNDER THE TENT:

  • 8PM SPEAKERFOXXX
  • 9PM DJ DK

TICKETS AVAILABLE HERE